What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

Long pause, OK. (Inaudible talking). Could you hang on for just a sec?

Hi this is Sargent Moss from the County detention center. Is this Sean?

Do you reside at 1234 X X Lane?

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{RING} {RING}

Whew, not in trouble!! But someone named Sean with a similar number is apparently about to have a rather bad day.

Is your number (xxx) xxx-xxxx??

Why is my stomach getting so big from taking testosterone cypionate 31 to 34 in 2 months?

ATTENTION SPIKES UP. What could he want with me? Did I do something wrong? Lord did I forget to pay something? Questions start flying through my head. What would the detention center sheriff want with me?

I hear a pause on the line, it goes quiet for a few seconds.

Sure no problem officer.

Are today’s baseball pitchers faster than a few years ago, or is it that radar guns have improved and get the pitch speed as it is released rather than as it reaches the plate?

I was trying to reach out to you because we have a Mr X here, who claims you are his legal guardian. He needs you to come down and sign some forms.

Looks at phone, sees a number local to me, so I answered.

HELLO

What should every American know before traveling to the UK?

Do what? Officer, I'm sorry I have no kids of my own, and I don't know anybody by that name.

No sir I sure don't, I live in the next city over.

Yes sir it is.

What do you think of the Black history lessons in the PBS documentary about jazz pianist-singer Hazel Scott?

I'm sorry to bother you, my staff just told me our guy corrected his information and had a number off for his home phone. Have a good day. Hangs up.

After a few moments he returns.